Building self confidence -
and a better life
Part 5 of 5. Self Confidence
Confidence skills can be learned and building self
confidence is something you can achieve.
In this fifth part of the building self confidence article, we look
at confidence in ourselves.
In this article we are looking at five elements that contribute to your
level of confidence and they are:
How we think and behave in these five areas will have a big impact
on our level of self confidence.
Confidence in ourselves
Being confident in ourselves is to truly know who we are
and to project our presence without feeling any anxiety. It is the ability
to rally people to a cause. Developing confidence in ourselves will
lead to us projecting a more forceful presence where
ever we go. Not over-powering rather, influential. By projecting
a positive image we will also influence our internal perception
of ourselves.
Improving confidence in ourselves develops a self-running self
improvement cycle. External positive image and body language
generates a greater level of self
esteem, on a sub-conscious level, which reinforces our
external posture.
With a healthy level of confidence in ourselves you
will be taken more seriously at work, at home and among our friends.
You will be the one people will naturally move toward when leadership
initiatives are needed.
Building Confidence in Ourselves
One last time - there is no magic solution to building self confidence,
but there are some things that can be done on a self-help level.
Practice these things and you will begin to develop better confidence
in yourself.
1. Know what signals you send. How you hold your head,
arms, in fact, every part of your body is influenced by the opinion
your have of yourself. Believe it or not, the simple act of standing
with a straight back and holding your head higher not only projects
a greater level of confidence in yourself, it acts on a sub-conscious
level and actually makes you feel better about yourself.
Try it now. It might take several experiments to get it right so try
it when talking on the phone next time or when waiting in a bank queue.
Most of all, smile and you will feel much happier!
2. Know when to tone down your signals. Following on
from the point above, know when to hold back on the "commanding
presence". It is not always appropriate to be forthright
and confident. Be aware of the expectations in each situation. For
example, when you need to be part of the team, ease up on the command
presence and go with the flow. When circumstances
call for a leader, rise to the challenge with confidence.
3. Know your own worth. You deserve to be heard as
much as the next person. Believe deep within yourself that what
you have to say is extremely valuable. There are always times
when silence truly is golden, but when the time is right and you have
something valuable to contribute go right ahead.
4. Knowing that you are worthy to be who you are and
where you are right now can be a difficult position to attain. Your
sense of worth depends on your existing beliefs about yourself. Begin
to eliminate your negative beliefs by working on the external signals.
See the first point above (Know what signals you send).
5. Observe others. Take time out every now and then
to learn from others. In any gathering of people there will be some
who seem to rise up and command an audience. Pick
a good spot and relax. Now watch them, their body language, their
eye contact, their movements and the air of confidence
surrounding them. Observe the unspoken communication that is always
going on. Now look around at the people who seem to be invisible and
are having little or no influence on the proceedings. Notice the difference.
Now practice these extremes over a period of time.
It will take time, but you will find that with ongoing observation
of other leaders and practicing the elements in this guide, you will
begin to master the art of confidence in yourself.
Where do you want to go now?
Select any of the five elements of self confidence
below or return to the start of the building
self confidence article.
>> 1. Confidence socially
>> 2. Confidence with our peers
>> 3. Confidence with others
>> 4. Confidence to perform
>> 5. Confidence in ourselves (you just read this part)
>> Self help resources page for books, CDs and DVDs that will help
with building self confidence.
>> Beginning of this series - Go
to the first part of Building Self Confidence
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