Building self confidence -
and a better life
Part 1 of 5. Social Confidence
Confidence skills can be learned and building self confidence
is something you can achieve.
What are the benefits of having a high level of self confidence? You
can experience greater fulfillment in personal relationships,
higher levels of success at work and have an overall
better feeling about yourself and your life.
Self confidence and self
esteem are closely related. You can have one without the other but they do tend to work better together. After you have read this page, take some time to read about building
self esteem.
There are at least five ways that self confidence manifests in our lives. Each of these elements contribute to your level of confidence. They are:
How we think and behave in these five areas will have a big impact
on our level of self confidence. Let's take a brief
tour of each of these five elements of confidence. Developing all five
will greatly enhance our self confidence. Even developing
just one element at a time will be beneficial for building self confidence.
Confidence in social situations
Being confident socially helps us to be ourselves when
talking with one or more other people. Whether it is at a party, with
a small group of friends after work or with a total stranger, social
confidence will allow us to share our thoughts and feelings in a way
that helps build relationships.
With a healthy level of social confidence we can enjoy the presence
of others and others will enjoy being in our presence.
Building Social Confidence Skills
While there is no magic solution to building self confidence, there
are some things that can be done on a self-help level. Practice these
things and you will begin to develop better social confidence
skills.
1. Be aware of your own mood and feelings. When
a mood or feeling takes you by surprise, make time to think about
what triggered your response. Try to understand why you think or feel
the way you do about situations you encounter in life.
Don't dwell on any failures of the past, rather use awkward social
experiences as a prompt to dig deeper into your our emotions.
When you understand more about how you react to certain situations
you will be better able to manage your reaction and discuss the same
type of situation in a more mature manner.
2. Be aware of and respect the mood and feelings of others.
Stepping on the feelings of others and not respecting their mood is
not going to help. Although you do not want to attend any pity parties,
being aware of others mood and feelings and responding in a gentle
manner will demonstrate that you care.
Showing that you care will lead to others being more open. They will
lay out their thoughts and feeling knowing that you will not trample
all over them. Use this to build and strengthen the relationship.
Show other people that you can be trusted with their
feelings and thoughts and will greatly improve your own social confidence.
3. Live in the present. Dwelling on the past, especially
past failures and bad experiences, is a guaranteed way of damaging
relationships. Although your own feelings and emotions need to be
respected, there is no need to keep going over old ground.
Friends usually have the capacity to hear you share about your past,
but no one wants to stay back there. Bring your life into the present
and focus on the positive aspects of the future.
Share your current successes and future hopes and
dreams. You will not only be doing yourself a favor, you will be helping
others along the self-development path.
4. Be open. As relationships develop, be prepared
to open up more of yourself. Keep the above dot point in mind and
limit the past negatives to a few. If they serve as a marker in your
life and help demonstrate just how far you have developed then do
include them.
Share more of your inner desires and dreams as you
get to know people. Being open and honest about who you are and where
you plan to go shows a personal level of commitment to a relationship.
It can also help you to fine-tune your life as others reflect on who
you are and where you are going. It is like a reality check.
Letting others into your life is as refreshing as opening the doors and windows after a long cold winter.
It not only lets in the fresh air, but as the light shines in, you become aware of those things that need attention.
Some things need to be dusted. You might even find some things that need to be thrown out as they were there just to
provide you comfort during the long winter.
Where do you want to go now?
Select any of the five elements of self confidence
below or return to the start of the building
self confidence article.
>> 1. Confidence socially (you just read this part)
>> 2. Confidence with our peers
>> 3. Confidence with others
>> 4. Confidence to perform
>> 5. Confidence in ourselves
>> Living A Life Of Abundance And Prosperity - Do you want to live a life of abundance and prosperity? If you want lasting happiness and fulfillment, connected loving relationships, respect and admiration from your family and friends, optimal health and vitality and to live a life you love then check this out.
>> Self help resources page for books, CDs and DVDs that will help
with building self confidence.
>> Top of page - Go
to the top of Building Self Confidence - Social Confidence article
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