Advanced Communication & Listening Skills

The best way to improve listening skills is to practice them. Once you are competent with most of the basic skills, try these extra advanced techniques.

Paraphrasing: Restate what you just heard to show that you are listening and that you understand what the speaker is saying. For example, if you are in a conversation and the other person says

"He should never have called her so soon after that incident."

You might respond with "So you believe that he should have waited a longer to make the call."

The benefits of paraphrasing are two-fold. First, you have to be actively listening in order to make sense when you paraphrase. Second, it demonstrates your interest in the conversation and helps to clear up misunderstanding when complex issues are being discussed.

Do not use paraphrasing continuously or you will begin to sound like a parrot. Rather, use it at key points in a conversation such as when strong emotions are being discussed or major decisions are about to be made.

Open Questioning: Open questioning keeps the conversation moving by encouraging thoughful replies. On the other hand, closed questioning is the type that requires only a 'yes' or 'no' answer. An example will help.

The other person says "I do not like my boss."
A closed question might be "Are you going to quit your job then?"
An open question might be "What is it about him that annoys you?"

The closed question does one main thing. It shuts down the conversation with a 'yes' or 'no' answer. It can also force the other person to commit to an answer 'Yes, I will quit my job' when they may not be ready to make such a decision.

The open question keeps the conversation alive and invites the other person to share their feelings and you can both explore the issue further. Open questions will often reveal deeper feelings about a topic that even the other person may not have considered. Open questions can actually help the other person to overcome a premature judgment of a situation and help them overcome a barrier to getting on in life.

See this page for some more tips on how listening skills can be improved.

Return to the main listening skills page.

Visit the listening skills resources page for products to enhance your listening skills.